So I applied for this reality show…

It’s called “Wipeout.” You may have seen it – it’s basically the American version of Most Extreme Elimination Challenge. I think I’d be really good on the show. Here are some of my answers to the application questions:

Q: WHAT ARE SOME OF THE MOST INTERESTING JOBS YOU’VE HAD?

A: My current position – I am in charge of a running program for the homeless 🙂 Past interesting jobs include bartender and child and adolescent therapist. I also work as a secret shopper from time to time. It’s fun because I can live out my spy dreams without getting caught and interrogated.

Q: WHAT WERE YOU VOTED “MOST LIKELY TO”…IN YOUR HIGH SCHOOL YEARBOOK?

A: I wasn’t voted anything, although I’m certain they intended to vote me “most likely to start a business wherein I embroider unicorns on…things”

Q: WHAT ARE YOUR WORST QUALITIES?

A: I struggle with timeliness. I procrastinate. I have been known to be a little on the stubborn side. I have a bad habit of hitting things (mainly other cars) with my car.

Q: WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

A:  Running, blogging, podcasting, starting craft projects and not finishing them

Q: GIVE AN EXAMPLE OF WHEN YOU HAVE RISEN TO A CHALLENGE IN COMPETITION.

A: I began running 6 years ago and struggled to complete my first 5K. After getting beat by Mena Suvari, who was 10 seconds ahead of me in a 5K, I then vowed to exact my revenge on her. Though she has no clue who I am, one day she will rue the day she beat Tiffany Brennaman by 10 seconds. Over the past two years I have begun placing in my age groups and have actually won overall female in two races.

Q: DO YOU HAVE ANY FEARS? IF SO, HOW DID THEY COME ABOUT?

A: Nothing really major – I just HATE snakes. I think that comes from the fact that they’re, well, really creepy.

Q: WHAT IS YOUR UNIQUE AND PERSONAL MOTIVATION FOR WANTING TO COMPETE ON THE SHOW?

A: I came across the show while flipping through the channels and immediately KNEW that I needed to be on it. I have worked really hard to get into the best shape of my life and I am sort of on the nutty, crazy side. I have gone bungee jumping and sky diving so heights are not a problem for me. I really love Most Extreme Elimination Challenge and got super excited when I saw that there was something similar to that in the US. Also – I really want to have a training montage.

Q: WHAT IS THE MOST DARING AND DANGEROUS THING YOU’VE EVER DONE?

A: I went skydiving for my 30th birthday and finagled my friends into doing it with me. I was getting some pretty ugly looks when “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” was playing over the loudspeaker in the shaky Cessna at 14,000 feet. Oh, and weather conditions weren’t terribly optimal that day.

Q: WHAT FAMOUS PERSON DO PEOPLE SAY YOU RESEMBLE?

A: I hear Orson Welles sometimes but I believe I’m more of a Natalie Wood (when she was 33). I’ve also been mistaken for Jennifer Love Hewitt (they were a little drunk but hell, I’ll take it).
Q: IF YOU COULD BE ANYONE LIVING OR DEAD, REAL OR FICTION, WHO WOULD YOU BE?
A: I would be a dinosaur. No explanation needed.
Q: DESCRIBE YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT EVER.
A: I used to work for United Way. At a national conference a few years back, they had a luau with an open bar and a karaoke machine. After I lost count of the number of drinks I’d had, I found myself grinding the floor, singing “Like a Virgin” with a bunch of folks gathered around (thank GOD iPhones hadn’t yet been invented). Needless to say, we left early the next morning (let me also mention that somehow I put my keys in the toilet the night before) and didn’t say goodbye.
Q: IS THERE ANYTHING INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL THAT WE SHOULD KNOW ABOUT YOU?
A: I am obsessed with unicorns, I’m a nostalgia freak (love anything mid-late 80’s/early90’s), and I have a cat named Dirt McGrit. I think airbrush is a lost art and that makes me sad.
Q: IF YOU WERE GRANTED ONE WISH, WHAT WOULD IT BE AND WHY?
A: I would end homelessness forever. And I would make unicorns real.

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